Allie at the St. Augustine Lighthouse a few years ago

My younger daughter Allie is growing up… way to quickly in my opinion… but, just the same, she is quickly maturing into a beautiful woman right before my very eyes.

Her life and our relationship over the past several years have been turbulent to say the least. Sparing you the zany details… we have grown to become very close through some trying experiences. I admire Allie’s strength and resilience… and, of course her loving spirit.

Through many changes and barriers I’ve struggled at times trying to understand my teenage daughter… the first challenge, obviously, is that she is a female and I’m a male… she’s also a pretty smart cookie but has done some incredibly silly things (does this person sound familiar?)… and she’s very… ummmm…. independent (yep, that would be the nice way of putting it!).

So along the way I’ve found out a few more interesting factoids about Allie…

I’ve always thought we were sort of alike… but only recently realized how much so… we’re scary similar! I asked her to take the Myers Briggs Personality Test and we came up with EXACTLY the same type. Then I had her take the love languages test and… you guessed it… we came up the same again. Just knowing this information for the people in your life can help you relate to and understand them better, be it your spouse, family, friends or co-workers.

She’s always busy taking care of other people and rarely asks for anything for herself. This is frustrating for me, a giving and loving type as I want to express my love for her but she will not open up on what her needs are.

fyi… we are not both morning people… she thinks I’m fairly obnoxious in the early morning. She hasn’t said so (lately) but I can hear it in her voice whenever I try to wish her a cheery Good Morning, or when she hears the coffee bean grinder at 4:38 a.m. That bean grinder brings back haunting memories for Allie. I think she’s permanently scarred from it!

Do you know your personality type and those of the other people in your life?

What advice could you share to help with better understanding your children?