Yes… No… and let’s not even throw in the good ole’ “maybe”

Are you a yes person? Do you have a hard time saying no to people when they ask you to help them, like maybe for a favor or for something that would require a commitment of your time? Maybe think of this decision as an investment, of sorts, in them (vs. you).

I have a really hard time telling people no. I feel guilty, and always seem to feel like I’m letting them down. I have even found myself overcommitted at times trying to please people when I should be focused on that which is most important. Yikes!

In many ways, I’m generally looking for ways to say yes. That’s most often a no brainer. Sometimes, though, I have to weigh this decision with saying no. So how do I know which way to go?

Objectively putting the “yes” vs. “no” decision in the proper context is helpful…

  • Am I being selfless… or selfish. Is it all about me? My desires and what I want? Am I doing this out of love for someone else… or will there be either a direct or indirect benefit to me. Tough… but telling questions.
  • Have I thought through what I’m being asked to do in the context of the 4 circles… in effect, I may have a different response to this Y or N question based on who is asking something of me. Yes, I need to give more to some folks than others. I don’t like that sometimes, but it is reality. Critically important, and I believe appropriate based on the bigger picture.

“Making the right yes / no decisions allows me to always be loving and real, yet maintain my integrity.” (Click to Tweet)

The bottom line:

Can I say yes and maintain the balance in life?

Can I say yes and still be me?

The reward: well, it’s called love. When we get this right, and we selflessly give generously, the resulting fulfillment is true inner joy.

The Q: Do you find yourself stopping to think sometimes when you have to make a yes or no decision? Anything particular about that thought process you can share?

Image courtesy of digitalart /